Last week, Gavin, over at Insanity’s Musings shared a powerfully open and honest post. And in his closing, he asked his readers to share a secret and a regret.

Today, I would like to elaborate a little more on my answers.

Secret….

I am fearful.

My own mother was shocked when I told her this, because she always saw me as being fearless.

Actor friends of mine have always said to me, “I would have never known you had tremendous stage fright, because you seem to be so confident.”

And my response has always been, “Yes….I’m confident that I’m afraid.”

You see, just because I do things doesn’t mean I don‘t fear them.

Fear has always been my greatest teacher, because I was born with a cornucopia of fear.

There have been so many things throughout my life that I have feared. Such as…..

Being accepted, being judged, intimacy, failure, death, not being smart enough, flying, talking in front of a large group of people.

And I can always tell when my life needs a good kick in the ass, because a fear will suddenly plop itself right down in front of me and say, “ Now…what are you going to do with this? You can either run away, or walk into it and see what happens.”

I think the only reason people see me as being fearless, is because I refuse to allow my fears to paralyze me. So, I guess they assume I’m not afraid.

But I am…really.

There is tremendous truth in the saying, “There is nothing to fear, but fear itself.”

I believe it’s the fear of fear that overwhelms me. Not the actual fear.

On one hand, being afraid makes me feel vulnerable to the unknown. And yet, on the other hand, it’s the catalyst that propels me forward.

Regrets….

I can honestly say I have no regrets.

Because like mistakes, as long as I learn from them there is nothing to regret. That’s why I don’t believe there is such a thing as a mistake.

Everything in my life happens for a reason. So, to say that I regret something is like saying that I regret the path of my life.

If I grow….what need is there to regret?

For me, fear and regret go hand in hand.

As long as I am willing to walk through the door of my fears….

….then there is nothing to regret.

Thanks, Gavin…..you’re an inspiration.