No sooner do I trim and coif the hair in my nostrils, two or three days later I once again have what appears to be two little bunny rabbits growing out of my schnozzola.

It’s strange, because as the hair on my head recedes, the hair in my nose seems to precede.

I’ve nicknamed my nose, Busch Gardens.

Last week at work while I was waiting on a customer, I kept feeling a little “tickle” on the side of my right nostril. And the whole time I’m talking to the customer, I repeatedly flicked my index finger over the tip of my nose; trying to indiscreetly scratch it without making it seem as though I was picking a boogie.

After the customer made their purchase and left the store, I ran to the nearest mirror to investigate what was going on with my nose.

And guess what I saw?

I saw a LONG dark gray hair protruding from my right nostril.


All I could think about was what the customer must have been thinking, while I was selling them a BEAUTY product with a hair sticking out of my nose that looked like a 4 inch iron carpentry nail.

How FREAKIN’ embarrassing was that?

The only thing I could think to do was to daintily stuff it back inside my nostril until I got home.

The second I got inside my apartment that evening, I ran to the bathroom, grabbed my nose hair scissors and CLIPPED that sucker out.

It must have weighed about 10 pounds because when the hair hit the sink, I actually heard a “clink” sound.


My abundant nose hair agenda seems to be getting worse every year. And summertime seems to make them grow like weeds.

Which leaves me with one aggressive alternative solution.

Gardening tools…..

And if that doesn’t work, I can always try this…..

Just call me……Pippi Longstocking